A long day

Today has been a long day. Most of it good, some of it not so good. The wifey is finally home, so that's a definite plus, and softball was good as usual, just being on the field and enjoying the weather, but it's what happened since we've been home that has me wondering. Even after everything we just went through, why do we argue so much? I know that every couple has their issues, but it just gets so tiring. It just seems like there is always something to argue about. No matter how hard I try to make it different. It seems like we are just destined to fight, if that is even possible. Maybe it has to do with mt PTSD, or maybe it's just me. I dunno but It's gotten old real quick. I've got to figure something out before it drives the both of us crazy.

Nothing to report

I'm tired and could probably fall asleep quickly, and just as I get comfy, I realize that I have to get up and take my meds. Such is life. So get up, take meds, lay down and welcome lala land. I do miss my kids though.

Late

This blog is late since I had a long day and nignt and the time ran away from me. So anyway, I hated leaving my honey alone at the hospital but I'm stuck on my meds so if I don't take them, bad things happen to me. It's just hard for me to see her so helpless and not be able to do anything for her. At least I should be there for her for support,  but I couldn't. So now its off to bed for me.

Blah

Today was a very blah day. I was really rushed and stressed this morning and took it out on people who didn't deserve it. By the afternoon things had calmed down considerably but I was still stressed because the wife has been in the hospital all day and night. Things are going good now but it was hard for me to let other people handle it and me stay home with the kids, waiting for the satellite man to get here. I was in rescue mode. Things worked out though, thanks to the support of close family.

Stepping up

As PTSD and TBI victims, we live day by day needing caregivers. Whether we want to admit it or not, some of us would be lost without them. But what happens when your caregiver is the one who needs care? We need to try our hardest to step up to the plate. Is it difficult, I'll be the first one to say yes it is, but it also has to be done. There are still household duties, kids, prrsonal issues and day to day things that need to be taken care of. We would love for our caregivers to be able to continue doing everything they've been doing, but they can't. So it's up to us.

How much is enough continued

There, now I can continue. Through our parenting classes and just my own perceptions, I wonder how much undo stress we put on our kids. With those of us dealing with PTSD and TBI's, how much of that stress is doubled? It woukd be foolish of me to think that my kids don't see that sometimes daddy gets mad over nothing. How do we think that is going to affect them? When it causes problems, how can we punish them? They are definitely a product of their environment. But then, how much leeway do we give them? As I stated, they know there are issues with daddy, and it is in a childs nature to attempt to capitalize on it. Why should they not try? They are living in the "all about them" phase of their lives, so that's their job, that's how they are supposed to act. As parents, we can pick up on these times and adjust fire accordingly, but that doesn't always work with those of us who have to deal with extra challenges. Again, I cannot stress how truly blessed we are to have spouses that are willing to walk through the dark with us and be there to smooth over the rough spots after we get finished causing the turmoil.

How much is enough?

First off, I barely made this blog in time so I'm gonna cheat real quick.