Stepping up

As PTSD and TBI victims, we live day by day needing caregivers. Whether we want to admit it or not, some of us would be lost without them. But what happens when your caregiver is the one who needs care? We need to try our hardest to step up to the plate. Is it difficult, I'll be the first one to say yes it is, but it also has to be done. There are still household duties, kids, prrsonal issues and day to day things that need to be taken care of. We would love for our caregivers to be able to continue doing everything they've been doing, but they can't. So it's up to us.

How much is enough continued

There, now I can continue. Through our parenting classes and just my own perceptions, I wonder how much undo stress we put on our kids. With those of us dealing with PTSD and TBI's, how much of that stress is doubled? It woukd be foolish of me to think that my kids don't see that sometimes daddy gets mad over nothing. How do we think that is going to affect them? When it causes problems, how can we punish them? They are definitely a product of their environment. But then, how much leeway do we give them? As I stated, they know there are issues with daddy, and it is in a childs nature to attempt to capitalize on it. Why should they not try? They are living in the "all about them" phase of their lives, so that's their job, that's how they are supposed to act. As parents, we can pick up on these times and adjust fire accordingly, but that doesn't always work with those of us who have to deal with extra challenges. Again, I cannot stress how truly blessed we are to have spouses that are willing to walk through the dark with us and be there to smooth over the rough spots after we get finished causing the turmoil.

How much is enough?

First off, I barely made this blog in time so I'm gonna cheat real quick.

Hmm

Tonight I'm not sure what to write about. It was a good day but nothing really jumps out at me. That's not necessarily a bad thing though, since that means that nothing bad happened either. I'm wrapped up in my new book I'm writing, which is coming along quite nicely and that makes me happy. I feel like this is going to be a good one and I hope I'm right because I'm thinking about sending this one off to a publisher. I dunno, I guess we'll see.

Summer time is back in gear.

Great day today. Another form of therapy that i have found is softball nights, which we have many of in my family. There is something about softball, the people, the companionship, the snack bar food, that brings back a sense of nostalgia, which in turn leads you down the road of better days, carefree days. Yes, this is all fluffy bunny stuff, but it's better than the hulk smash stuff that is usually following me. Which would you rather have? I thought you'd say that, fluffy bunny. I think that sometimes I take for granted the simple things, like a cool breeze blowing off a softball field, a hot dog  a box of popcorn, and the cheering of the crowd over a great catch or a home run hit. Win or lose, it's another memory put back to help combat those helpless feelings that we sometimes get. Is this a end all be all for what ails us, of course not, but I think it's a step in the right direction. Maybe it's the feeling that we have that define us, not really our actions. A look can speak volumes they say. That look imparts a feeling in the one on the receiving end of that look. Feelings. So in that same vein, maybe the feeling of a softball field experience is more important than the actual experience. The actual experience only happens once, but the memory and feelings from that experience live on forever. I'd like to think I've touched on something here. If I'm wrong, then so be it, but what harm can come of it? The worse that can happen is the faraway look that you'll get when you get a whiff of that certain scent, and go careening off to softball land. Summertime is finally here, that old ballpark, man, is back in gear out on 49, man I can see the lights. It's a smile, it's a kiss, it's a sip of wine, it's summertime. Thanks Kenny

Tired again

So this post is going to be very short, but a post nonetheless. I got some stuff done today that I'm very happy about, and I think that is very therapeutic in and of itself. Just having that sense of accomplishment, and the knowledge that I could do it on my own, does a lot for my self esteem and drive. I hope that having those feelings will help to propel me to greater lengths, especially on my down days.

Average

Really nothing to say tonight. It was just an average day. We got a lot accomplished actually. It feels pretty good to know that you have something to show for your work at the end of the day. I guess that just shows hlw blessed I am. I'm sure some people would love to have just an average day, but because of our problems, those days just seem so few and far between. So if you're one of those that have average days every now and again, cherish them. Sometimes few and far between is all we have.